Stepping Stones

Lessons on Intentional Living with Lisa McGrath

Recognize and Honor Other People’s Boundaries

boundaries

Recognize and Honor Other People’s Boundaries 

 Do you have personal and professional boundaries? Creating personal and professional boundaries takes time and patience to learn, but I believe you’re up to the challenge. What you may not realize is that it can sometimes be just as difficult to honor the boundaries of those around you. Continue reading to learn how to recognize other people’s boundaries. Showing respect for the limits others set is just as important as learning to create your own.

 Understanding Others’ Boundaries

 We’re all raised with different beliefs about what is acceptable with regard to boundaries. Thus, it makes sense that we might not recognize or understand the types of limits the people around us are setting for themselves. We’re also not often taught how to be clear and explicit about our personal preferences with others. Misaligned boundaries and poor communication are common reasons for overstepping bounds. It can be difficult to know what types of boundaries the people we interact with have set and hold, so common courteous behavior that respects others should be the foundation of your communication. 

 Examples of Boundary Violations

 There are lots of ways you may unintentionally disrespect or cross someone’s boundary. Making assumptions about someone’s needs or desires is one common example. Gossiping or interrupting are simple behaviors that can also be disrespectful. This behavior is often seen with families; whether done intentionally or without malice, it still is destructive. When you discount someone’s feelings, you make them feel bad and cross unspoken lines. You should never assume that people think and believe the same ways in which you do. This is a sure way to cause problems among set bounds...and it crosses a line of respect for others.

 How to Recognize and Respect Boundaries

 While this is a complex topic, there are some ways that can help you to recognize other people’s boundaries. Once you are able to see these limits, you can then take steps to respect and honor them. First of all, take care to listen carefully to your friends, co-workers, and loved ones. You’ll often hear underlying or even explicit messages they are sending when you simply take time to pay attention. If you feel you may not have understood or heard something, you should then open up the lines of communication and ask. Talking about your preferences, wants and needs are the best way to be clear on them. Paying attention to body language or subtle cues can also be useful. If someone isn’t comfortable with a conversation topic or behavior, they may cross their arms. Perhaps they’ll look away or change the subject. These kinds of clues can let you know a boundary exists.

 Recognizing other people’s boundaries isn’t difficult once you take the time to look for clues. Being open to honest and direct communication will also help. With the understanding of the boundaries of others, you can start to work toward respecting them.

Until next time...

Lisa

P.S. Communication skills and relationship building are both masterclass topics in my monthly online coaching program, A Pilgrimage to Self. When we learn to value ourselves, understand our self-worth, set our own boundaries, and design our own Intentional Life, we are in a better position to choose how we respond to others. Just as we want them to recognize and honor our personal and professional boundaries, we must do the same. You can learn more about A Pilgrimage to Self at www.lisamcgrath.me

 

 

 

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