Stepping Stones

Lessons on Intentional Living with Lisa McGrath

No! An Important Decision When You Feel Pressured

a pilgrimage to self intentional life

No! An Important Decision When You Feel Pressured

 Ever have someone come to you for a decision with a ludicrous deadline? The pressure is enormous and your head swims with the push-pull of what to do or say. When this happens, simply say “no!”

 Saying no ensures that you won’t find yourself:

  • Over committed
  • In an uncomfortable situation
  • Embarrassed
  • Resentful
  • And more

 Feeling pressured into a decision is no way to be. If your reaction isn’t a resounding “heck yeah”, then it should be a simple “no way.” If the person applying pressure doesn’t understand, that’s about them… not you.

 Note: You can easily make saying "no" a consistent reaction to pressured requests. Simply warn the asking party - including your children - that all requests for an immediate answer will be “no.” This will give a definitive answer and will cause people to offer more notice, more information, and more time for you to come to whatever decision you want to, naturally and without pressure.

 Why a default no is best:

 ✔Being put on the spot ignites the fight or flight response. This causes a lot of mixed emotions, which have no business in your thought processes. It’s bad practice to make decisions that are emotionally driven.

 ✔It teaches those closest to you to be prepared and give you time. Being ready to say no - even to something you might ultimately say yes to - sets healthy boundaries that your family and co-workers can respect. As long as you hold to the practice, you’ll only have to say no once or twice before people adapt and give you proper notice.

 ✔It protects everyone. From the person asking - who might be trying to get permission for something risky - to yourself, saying no can protect everyone. Taking the time to assess the pros and cons will make an informed decision a safer bet.

 Sometimes you’ve got to put up boundaries. When people come to you for an immediate decision, consider no as your answer. It takes time and information to make some decisions and absent of those things, a no can be a safer response.

 Make sure to protect yourself...use the default "no."

Until Next Time...

Cheers!

Lisa

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The life philosophy of A House With Four Rooms suggests thinking of yourself as being four rooms: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual rooms. It advocates for doing something daily for your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

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