Stepping Stones

Lessons on Intentional Living with Lisa McGrath

Guess What - You’re Not the Only One with a Loud Inner Naysayer

Guess What - You’re Not the Only One with a Loud Inner Naysayer 

 Your inner critic can have a tremendous effect on all aspects of your life...it can hold you back from taking risks and putting yourself out there. Many use negative self-talk to keep safe, but in the end, it usually only creates havoc and harm.

As they say, you’ll never know if you don’t try, but that mean voice or inner naysayer often keeps you from doing just that. Because your inner critic is so powerful, it’s easy to think you’re the only one struggling. Logic will tell you that’s not true. You’re not the only one with a loud inner naysayer. Most people have this same issue. Keep reading to find out why you don’t know about it.

 Everyone Has One

 It’s true. Everyone must deal with an inner naysayer sometimes. Each person’s critic is different. Some folks have more of a handle on theirs than others though. Chances are, even the most confident person you know deals with an inner critic once in a while, but the difference is she knows how to silence it.

There’s definitely a line between being confident and being a narcissist. If someone has an over-inflated ego, that could be a problem not only for themselves, but those around them. It’s healthy to question yourself sometimes as long as you are able to balance that with reality. It’s important to not be paralyzed by your own negative self-talk.

 Why We Don’t Know

Vulnerability is hard for most of us. It’s difficult to admit when we’re struggling. People are afraid to tell others how hard they are on themselves or how fearful they might be. No one wants to talk about such weaknesses though. And often, we feel isolated or alone.

It’s been built into our society to praise independence and self-reliance. This is one of the biggest reasons we aren’t aware just how much the people around us are dealing with their own inner struggles.

 Ask Around

 It might help you to talk to people you’re close to and trust. Be vulnerable and tell them you’re struggling with your inner naysayer. Ask them to give their opinion on whether what your inner critic is telling you is true. Chances are, they’ll have a much more realistic picture of you and your abilities. I know during my darkest moments, I shared my thoughts with a trusted friend to make sure I wasn't falling for the thoughts of my inner naysayer. This can be a confidence booster. It can help to create a stronger bond with your friend or family member. It can also open the door to asking the other person about their own inner naysayer.

Once you’ve been vulnerable about yours, it won’t be so difficult for them to share their own struggle. Give this approach a try, and you’ll probably learn you’re not the only one in your circle who deals with this pesky problem.

 Your inner critic can be harsh. You’re not the only one dealing with this self-criticism. It can truly help to know that you're not alone and there is something you can do about it.

Remember, if you need help, reach out and ask for encouragement and support. 

Until next time...

Lisa

P.S. You may be interested in learning more about the benefits of learning strategies to cope with your inner critic and naysayer...because of the overwhelm, frustration, and anxiety women are experiencing during this pandemic, I’ve opened 6 additional coaching slots in my private 1:1 coaching programs. If you’d like more information, message or email me at [email protected]

 

 

 

 

The life philosophy of A House With Four Rooms suggests thinking of yourself as being four rooms: physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual rooms. It advocates for doing something daily for your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.

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